Bend for Me Page 9

  “I don’t want you hanging out with her anymore,” Melody said, passing back the phone. Kadence stared at the device in her lap, clenching her jaw. “Kae, I’m serious. Promise me you will stay away from Avery Bennett.”

  “I…”

  “Kadence.”

  Kadence sighed, no longer wanting to put up any more of a fight. “Okay.”

  “Stay here tonight, okay?” Melody’s voice softened now that Kadence had agreed. “I’m proud of you for coming here instead of—”

  “Yeah.” She didn’t want to talk about that. Nor did she want to resort to it.

  “I’m going to grab some blankets and pillows and meet you out here, all right?”

  Once Melody was out of sight, Kadence unlocked her phone reading the messages.

  Kadence Cooper: Go fuck yourself! Stay away from me. I never want to see you again.

  She sighed, tossing it back onto the coffee table. She spent the night cramped on the couch, Melody’s arm holding her defeated frame.

  Chapter Eleven

  AVERY HATED HOW MUCH of an ass she had been. She was no better than her fuckboy ex, and the realization made her sick. She crumpled into herself, hiding in the storage area until she could gather enough sanity to slip out unnoticed. By then, Kadence was long gone. When Avery tried to call her, wanting desperately to explain and apologize, Kadence had sent her another slap in the face.

  Avery Bennett: I’m so sorry. I don’t know what came over me.

  She did though. Logan Davidson. That’s what. And she let him win. Again. She spent the rest of her night sitting on the couch with her phone clasped in one hand, the remote in the other.

  ***

  “Hey.” Emma greeted her the next morning as she strolled through the doorway glowing, Danny in tow. He pecked her on the cheek, nodded to Avery and left.

  “Have a good night?” Avery asked dryly once the door closed.

  “Yeah.” Emma grinned, still dreamily facing the doorway. “You and Kadence left early, too.” She grinned, eyeing the bedroom.

  “She’s not in there,” Avery said flatly.

  “Just checking.” Emma’s tone was teasing, but Avery was far from in the mood.

  “Don’t worry. I won’t be seeing her anymore.”

  “What do you mean you won’t be seeing her again?” Emma placed her hands on her hips.

  Avery’s tired eyes fell to the carpet.

  “What did you do, Avery?”

  “I fucked up, Em. I fucked up big time.”

  A knock on the door prevented her from continuing. She sighed as her roommate turned to answer.

  “Danny,” Emma said expectantly as she went to answer the door. “Did you forget some…Davidson?” Emma stiffened, shifting in front of the door to block him from entering the apartment. Avery shrunk into the cushions of the couch, bile churning in the back of her throat.

  “What the hell are you doing here?” Emma growled.

  “I wanted to talk to Avery, if that’s okay,” Logan said, rubbing at the back of his neck.

  “No. In what fucking universe would that ever be okay?” Emma hissed before slamming the door. She locked it in seconds, leaning her back against the door with a groan. “Did you know he was in town?”

  “Yeah,” Avery whispered, eyes glassy. “Found out last night when he came to the gallery. Surprise, right?” She laughed dryly.

  “Oh, no…” Emma looked at her with concern, putting the pieces together. “Please tell me you didn’t?”

  Avery trained her gaze to the ground.

  “You took it out on Kadence?”

  “In the worst way possible.” Avery ran her hands across her face with a groan. “I tried to get her to sleep with me.”

  “Avery…” Emma looked at her with a mixture of disappointment, frustration, but mostly pity.

  “I’m an ass.”

  “Yeah. Obviously. Part of me kinda wants to beat you up right now.”

  “I wouldn’t blame you.”

  “But another part of me knows you’re probably already beating yourself up for it.”

  Avery grunted, throwing her face into a pillow as she pressed forward, trying to suffocate herself.

  “Stop that.” Emma tugged the back of her shirt. “Do you want me to say something?”

  Avery shook her head in dejection. “I fucked up. It’s my own fault.”

  “Okay. Let me know how I can help.”

  “I’ll figure something out.”

  ***

  Something turned out to be a tall glass of blonde in the bathroom of a local bar. She was pretty enough. Ordinary looking but did well to help numb the pain for the moment.

  “More,” Avery demanded and the woman eagerly obliged.

  “Tessa, by the way.” The taller blonde panted when they’d finished. “My name is Tessa.”

  “Avery.”

  Avery returned to the apartment smelling of alcohol and smoke, snapback sideways on her disheveled hair. She wobbled to the bathroom, washing her face with an exasperated moan.

  “What are you doing?” From the doorway, Emma narrowed her eyes in disappointment.

  I don’t know. But I can’t fix it. Avery scowled at her own image in the mirror. Emma’s eyes met hers through the reflection.

  “Have you spoken to Kadence?”

  Avery shook her head. The alcohol was making the room spin. She let it swirl around her, distracting her from her guilt and grief. “Have you?”

  Emma shook her head. “She canceled yoga.”

  Everything is so fucked up. “Fuck. Fucked. Fucking. Fuck.” Avery repeated it until the word itself sounded comical. She giggled and teetered on her feet as Emma rushed to her side to steady her.

  “Come on,” Emma said, sighing. “To bed with you.” She shoved Avery in the direction of her bedroom. Avery brushed the shirts from her bed onto the ground, kicking her shoes off into the closet. She couldn’t stand the pitying look Emma gave her as she flopped onto the sheets. When the door closed, she pulled out her phone.

  She crawled up her bed, reaching into the drawer of the nightstand. Thank the gods for drunk food. She grabbed two large pieces of jerky from the bag as she stared at the phone, scrolled through her contacts. She could call her again, but there were risks. Kadence could hang up on her. She could just not answer her at all. After all, she had told Avery to, as she so eloquently put it, fuck off.

  She took a rather aggressive bite of the dried meat, tearing it with a tug of her teeth. Screw it.

  Kadence’s line rang with no signs of ending. Avery hung up with a sigh. She sent her another text. After no response, almost three hours later, she tried again. No answer. No response.

  ***

  Avery’s attempt the next day yielded the same results. And the next. And the next. And the next. By the fifth day, Avery had lost all hope. It didn’t make any sense to her. Why did she care so much? She shouldn’t be letting this rejection get to her. After all, she wasn’t supposed to get attached. She flipped onto her stomach, burying her face in the pillow as she released a pent-up scream.

  If Kadence didn’t want to give her the chance at an apology, fine. The only way to get past someone was to get under someone else. She scrolled through her contacts, skimming the names until she hovered on a certain name. She hit the call button.

  Here goes nothing.

  It rang once.

  Maybe this isn’t such a good idea.

  It rang a second time.

  No, fuck it. You need this.

  It rang a third time.

  Who cares? It’s not like you were even dating. If Kadence doesn’t want you, it’s her problem.

  It rang a fourth time.

  It’s not your problem. This is all Logan’s fault anyway.

  It rang a fifth time.

  It’s fine. It’s just going to be another no-strings attached fling.

  It rang a sixth time. Stop. This is so wrong.

  Just as Avery was about to pull the phone away from h
er ear, she heard a hesitant hello on the other end. Well, shit. She took a breath, collecting herself. “Hey, it’s Avery.”

  “Oh,” the voice said in recognition. “I was wondering if I was going to hear from you again.”

  “I’ve been busy.” Busy getting my phone calls rejected. “So,” Avery said in a low voice. “What are you doing tonight, beautiful?”

  “You.” Tessa’s reply held no hint of hesitation.

  Avery cracked a smile. “I knew I liked you for a reason.”

  There was a soft laugh on the other end. “Nine thirty. I’ll text you my address.”

  ***

  Emma pounced on her the second she unlocked the entryway. “Sit down.”

  “Nice to see you, too, Em. My day was fine.” Avery rolled her eyes as she kicked the door shut. She toed off her sneakers before tossing her keys into the bowl on the counter. They swirled against the rim before sliding down with a soft clink.

  Emma crossed her arms. “This has to stop.”

  “What does?” Avery feigned innocence.

  “You know what.”

  “She doesn’t want to see me, Em. I tried. What do you want me to do?”

  “Try harder.” Emma bit back. “You can’t keep doing this. I get that Logan hurt you. And for a while, I understood why you were acting the way you were. But it’s been more than a year. You need to get it together. This isn’t you.” She gestured up and down Avery. “None of this is who you are.”

  Avery tilted her chin in defiance, rolling her eyes.

  “Avery!” Emma whacked her hard with one of the couch cushions. “Stop running from your problems. You can’t just push people away and lash out when things don’t work out.”

  “I don’t have any problems.”

  “Yeah, you clearly do. You feel guilty about what you did and you’re coping with it in an unhealthy way, just like you did with Logan.”

  “I’m nothing like Logan.”

  Emma groaned in frustration. Avery knew she was being bullheaded, but hey, no one likes being called out on their shit.

  “I’m not saying you’re like Logan. I’m saying that you aren’t handling this the right way. You know that. This isn’t you. Doesn’t it feel wrong to you?”

  Yes. “People change.” Avery shrugged. “They grow up.”

  “Yeah, they do. So, when will you?”

  ***

  For every day Kadence ignored her calls, Avery made Tessa cum twice. She had to hand it to Tessa, her stamina was pretty good. Probably not as good as Kadence’s, she guessed, but still. She mentally berated herself for thinking of Kadence while hooking up with another person, pressing her fingers deeper into the squirming blonde as her tongue worked overtime to bring her to the edge yet again. Tessa’s body arched, shaking until she had to tug Avery away by her hair, chest heaving. Avery felt sick to her stomach.

  “Fuck, Avery. As much as I love when you do that, I need a break.”

  “Okay.” Avery’s voice cracked as she rolled off the woman, shuffling to the other side of the bed.

  Tessa watched her tentatively.

  They sat in silence.

  “So, uhh, that was a new record, I think,” Tessa said with a chuckle. “I’m surprised I haven’t blacked out yet.” The joke fell flat and she frowned. “Do you wanna tell me what’s bothering you?”

  “No.”

  “Look, Avery, I love a good hook-up as much as anyone else, but even you know this doesn’t feel right.” Avery hated the pitiful expression Tessa was currently giving her. She didn’t need emotions involved in this. She didn’t want them. Emotions only meant the risk of getting hurt.

  “This is supposed to be a no-strings-attached sorta thing. And you’re attached. To something or someone and—”

  “Can you stop talking?” Avery clenched her fists.

  Tessa balled the sheets between her fingers.

  “I’m just going to go.”

  Tessa merely nodded, scooping Avery’s shirt from the ground. She handed it to her before picking up her own scattered clothing from where they had haphazardly been tossed the previous night. The memories made Avery’s stomach churn. They dressed in silence, engulfed in a somberness neither wanted to address.

  “Whatever happens. I hope everything works out for you.”

  Avery could only nod before closing the door behind her.

  ***

  Avery found herself, longboard under her feet, careening through the streets to the park. She settled onto the bench, watching a world of childhood simplicity pace by.

  “Avery!” An excited, high-pitched voice called out. A blur of red hair barreled toward her, almost causing her to tumble with the force of the little boy.

  “Hey, little dude.” She greeted him with a smile that couldn’t reach her eyes. Ryan didn’t seem to notice. “What’s up?”

  “We’re just about to start a game. Do you have time to play? You promised.” Avery’s stomach filled with even more guilt.

  “I don’t know, Rye. I’m not —”

  “Please, Avery!” He clasped his hands together, bouncing on the balls of his feet. “I miss you. We all do.”

  “All right.” She caved, following the boy to the group of young teenagers who had been tossing the basketball amongst themselves.

  “Guys! Look. Avery’s here.” Ryan’s announcement was met with a chorus of cheers.

  “I want her on our team,” the smallest of the boys, Evan, declared.

  “No way.” Ryan crossed his arms.

  “I called her first.”

  “But I’m the one who asked her.”

  “Avery!” A matching pair of pouting lips turned to Avery.

  It made her heart swell. These kids didn’t know about the horrible week she had, or the horrible things she had done. They simply wanted her. They enjoyed her company. They missed her. And to have them fight over her, even if it was such a trivial matter, had Avery fighting back tears.

  “Let’s compromise. We can play two games. I’ll play the first one with you.” Avery gestured to Evan. “And then the next with you.”

  Ryan beamed, rushing to wrap his arms around her stomach, giving her the tightest squeeze. Avery ruffled his hair before he ran off to join the rest of his team.

  Ball in hand, she coursed down the court with a parade of kids, all a foot shorter than her, chasing after her for control. Her heart pounded in her chest as she worked the pavement. Each pat of the ball against the cement bounced a little piece of her troubles away. Surrounded by youthful innocence, she let herself go.

  Just as she was about to make another basket, she grabbed Evan, handing him the ball. Mustering all her might, she hoisted him into the air to make the final shot. The swift swooshing sound of the basket paired with the look on his face made all the aching she knew she was going to feel the next morning entirely worth it.

  ***

  After the final game, she collapsed onto the grass, chest heaving. She closed her eyes, a wave of nostalgia rolling across her. Distant cheers floated in and out of her ears as she transported herself to a peaceful place.

  “You’re the best, Avery. Logan never plays with us,” a voice said beside her.

  Amber eyes fluttered open. Avery didn’t have a response for the little one who praised her. She didn’t want to defend him, but she also felt terrible for knowing he never would. Aside from his unwelcome visit a few weeks ago, he wasn’t coming back. He was merely in town for a business trip, hoping to get laid while he had some downtime. Logan had gotten a new job a few months after their breakup and Avery couldn’t be happier about his departure. She did feel bad for Ryan though. He had always liked playing ball with her ex-boyfriend. And at the time, she had enjoyed watching them and even joining them as well.

  “You’re better than him. At least you stop by sometimes.”

  The pit of her stomach dropped. Ryan continued, naively unaware of the weight his words held. “Do you wanna get ice cream with us? It’s gonna be dark soon. The park
is gonna be closing.”

  She shook her head. “I should probably head home. Thank you, though.”

  “Okay.” Ryan pushed himself off the grass before brushing his hands on his shorts. “Thanks again for hanging out with us.”

  “Anytime, kiddo.” She offered Ryan and the rest of the boys a wave, ensuring they safely crossed the street before going their separate ways.

  Once out of sight, Avery retreated. Not ready to return to the real world, she sought out sanctuary at the playground’s abandoned swing set. The seat squeezed against her hips and she wished she could stay cradled in her own little bubble.

  You’re better than him. Tears spilled from her eyes. Longing, loss, and despair all mixing into one salty cascade down her cheeks. She hated him, but she hated herself. She did this. Yes, he was a catalyst, but she was the one who dug her own hole. Now she was in so deep, she wasn’t sure she’d ever be able to get herself up to the ledge again.

  Just a few minutes ago, she had been at peace, at ease. And with a flip of a switch, she was in hysterics. Maybe this was the universe’s way of sending her a sign, punishing her for the shitty person she had become. She cried until her choking sobs morphed into gasps for air, dissolving into the darkness of the night.

  She should leave. No need to get arrested for trespassing. She dislodged herself from the seat her thighs had molded to and proceeded to the park exit. As she rounded the corner, Avery caught sight of a body lying on the ground. Her first instinct was the call the police, thinking it was a corpse.

  Come on, Avery. You know that’s extremely illogical. But when she stepped closer, all sense of logic flew out the window. Okay, universe. You got what you wanted. Please stop with the torture. That’s enough for one day.

  Sprawled on the grass lay Kadence, hair splayed out. Her eyes were shut, chest rising and falling. Avery felt like an absolute creep for staring, but she was unable to move. She hadn’t seen the woman for almost two weeks and now Kadence was here. Before she could stop herself, she settled beside the raven-haired dreamer. She kept her eyes glued forward, afraid to speak and scare Kadence away again.